lopez, for joining "american idol" and becoming the sexiest judge on tv. [ cheers ] besides that hot piece of gavel judge joe brown. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ i'm guilty as charged, yo take me away lock me up ♪ ♪ lock me up lock me up yeah! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ thank you, person who doesn't get sarcasm. no, really, i mean it. thank you so much. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] ♪ thank you, fall, for occasionally going by the name autumn. just like my cousin megan, who became a stripper. [ laughter ] put your hands together, you guys, for autumn! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] [ light laughter ] thank you, oven mitts, for making me look like a hockey goalie when i'm pulling casseroles out of the oven. [ laughter ] [ applause ] my last thank-you note, right here. [ audience aws ] shh, not today. not tonight. not ever. 'cause -- 'cause i'm gonna do this thank-you note. and i'm gonna do it for each and every one of you guys out in the audience. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ i'm gonna do it right. i'm gonna do it right. i just hope it's funny. [ laughter ] ♪ thank you,